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When there is a threat of War, how do we look after our mental health?

Staffordshire Mental Health Counsellor and CEO of Mind Management For You Sheila McMahon shares her thoughts on the current situation and how we can help ourselves and each other.

Overwhelm

So, here we are. We have just gone through a pandemic and now we’re facing the threat of World War 3. This is yet another thing we didn’t expect with people saying, “I didn’t expect to see this in my lifetime”.

People are still recovering from the knock-on effects of Covid-19 and the threat of a war can just be too much to take in. Understandably, a lot of people are feeling overwhelmed by it all.

Different responses

Firstly, everyone is different and will have different responses to what is going on in Ukraine.

Some people may find it unhelpful to watch the news and be in denial about what is going on.

Others may be judged with comments like ‘You don’t care’ when sometimes people care so much that they just can’t bear to watch the suffering going on.

Most people want to help and there are ways people can do that.

Some people are helping by donating money, some people are bringing essential items to countries with Ukrainian refugees, some people are praying, and others are opening their homes to Ukrainian refugees. People find different ways to help.

My way of helping people is by keeping them sane during these difficult times.

Self-neglect

In times of crises, it is even more important to look after our wellbeing.

It’s like the analogy of the oxygen mask on an airplane – if the plane drops in altitude, the parent needs to put on the mask first to be able to look after the child.

It’s the same for us, if we want to look after each other then we need to look after ourselves too. This was highlighted as ‘self-neglect’ in the recent Kate Garraway documentary ‘Caring for Derek’.

It highlighted that a lot of people in care are so busy looking after someone else that they can forget about themselves. It’s the same as expecting a car to run without fuel – it won’t! We need to refuel our bodies and our minds. It is important that, despite what is going on, that we keep doing the things that make us feel well – like sport, walking, connecting with others and having fun.

Mortality

Both Covid-19 and the threat of a war bring our mortality to the forefront of our minds.

Our experiences and attitudes towards our mortality will influence how we respond when our mortality is threatened.

Our response is something that we are in control of. We can accept our mortality – accept that it’s the natural cycle of life. We can even use humour around this. Back in my birthplace of Ireland I often hear the expression that: “I wake up in the morning and I read the death notices. If I am not in there, I get up!”

Acceptance

All we can do is our best and that is good enough. We can live in the moment and trust that things will be ok. As a society we have come through two world wars. We can choose to have faith in our leaders that they will protect us as best they can and make decisions that need to be made.

We can accept that ‘It’s ok not to be ok’ and have a good cry or get angry when we need too and off load it in a healthy way.

It really is ok not to be ok.

And we can remember the serenity prayer – to accept the things we cannot change, to change the things we can and the wisdom to know the difference!

Sheila offers free 2 minute weekly well-being videos on her YouTube Channel l here and encourages people to subscribe and be part of her growing mental wealth community.

Sheila will be performing a Mental Health Theatre Show on Saturday 16th April at 7.45pm at Stafford Gatehouse Theatre and also delivers mental health awareness talks and training, both in person and online. For more visit her website here.


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